UrbanWire

Take 1
David Beckham is having a head of worries since his wife, former Posh Spice Victoria Beckham sacked his 2 personal bodyguards. The duo was sacked after having an argument with Posh Spice about them giving tip-offs to paparazzi, reported The Straits Times.

Feeling sore over the sack, the 2 are getting back at Beckham by offering his personal information to the media for £500,000 (S$1.55 million). The bodyguards had been by the world’s most expensive footballer’s side around the clock for the past 3 months when he was in Madrid, taking care and arranging everything for him.

There have even been claims by one to have kept daily records, photographs and even voice recordings of Beckham’s activities.

Who needs to hire a private investigator to check on a possibly straying spouse when you can just fire his bodyguards and get them to spill the dirt for you? [^top]

Take 2
A man’s mobile phone exploded, burning his buttocks while he was having a nap.

The 40 year-old Malaysian, Mohamed Radzuan was charging his phone and placed it on his bed near him just before he fell asleep, reported Yahoo!News . "At first I was confused about what had exploded, but I realised it was my mobile phone when I saw it was shattered in pieces,” said Radzuan.

Makes you think twice about hanging your mobile phone round your neck, doesn’t it now? [^top]

Take 3
Despite the economy picking up slightly, Taiwan President Chen Shui-Bian seems to be tightening his pockets.

For the 4th consecutive year, Chen will return to his hometown in Tainan County, with gifts for his townspeople. However, the values of the gifts and hong baos (red packets with token gifts of money) have shrunk tremendously to values worth only NT10 (S$0.50).

According to the Taipei Times , the tradition of Presidents giving away hong baos started with President Lee Teng-Hui who gave away packets worth 20 times as much to the people in his hometown Taipei County.

The reason for the wide difference of NT170 was blamed on the coming elections. Chen might face charges for bribery if he were to give voters amounts of NT30 and above.

However, there are Taiwanese who debate that its unethical for the President to give hong baos as the money comes from the state allowances.

Now Future Taiwan Presidents will definitely probably be praying for elections to be held around the Lunar New Year. That will be saving them from burning a hole in their pockets. [^top]

Take 4
After an absence of 30 years, firecrackers have made a crackling comeback in Chinatown at this year’s Lunar New Year celebrations, attracting a large crowd of 90,000 people, reported Yahoo!News .

Believed to ward off evil spirits, firecrackers used to be lit by the Chinese long ago, until the Singapore government decided to ban them for safety reasons. Forgoing such beliefs and in an attempt to attract more tourists to Singapore, the lighting of firecrackers now bring in more business for vendors at Chinatown.

Well, we know for sure that the firecrackers didn’t scare the God of Fortune away. [^top]

Take 5
Joyce Tsang, founder of Modern Beauty Salon is pressing charges against Marianne Wong, manager of the late Hong Kong diva, Anita Mui.

Anita Mui had signed a 2-year endorsement contract with Modern Beauty last September but died of cervical cancer 3 months later. Unhappy that she wasn’t notified about Mui’s medical condition at the time that the contract was signed, Tsang is now demanding a compensation of HK$2 million (S$440,000), reported The Straits Times.

The media came to know of this dispute when reporters received some letters and a CD containing a recording of a conversation between Wong and Tsang.

Wong countered that she was unaware of Mui’s deteriorating health conditions then, and also claimed ignorance of the recording of the conversation between Tsang and her.

Singapore made a historical landing in the book of records thanks to her world-renowned airlines.

The Airbus A345, also known as the Leadership, departed from Changi Airport at 4pm (Singapore time) and is expected to reach Los Angeles also at 4pm(US time). This record-breaking flight has pipped the United Airlines service from Chicago to Hong Kong to the post.

SIA claimed that passengers on board travel in comfort. They can look forward to much more spacious seats and SpaceBeds in both the business and economy classes. Better still, they can enjoy entertainment from the newly-installed DVD port in their seats.

According to SIA chairman Mr Koh Boon Hwee, in a news release, “In all respects, this is a premium product, complemented by premium cabin service. It was designed for the seasoned businessperson, or the more discerning leisure traveller who is prepared to spend a little more to get the best. We believe they will like what we have to offer.”

Well, if they don’t at least they won’t have to endure it for very long. [top^]

Singaporeans are betting their luck to win the Toto HongBao Jackpot’s $10 million prize, said Yahoo! News.

Some Singapore Pools outlets have extended their opening hours since they were flooded by thousands of punters islandwide.

Despite long queues to place their bets, Singaporeans did not seem to mind a shot at grabbing the $10 million on this auspicious 15th day of the Lunar New Year.

If people weren’t so money mad, they might have realised that lucky day or not, the prize money may have grown, but the number of prizes didn’t, so the odds were really just as bad as any other day. [top^]

Fast food chains like KFC and McDonald’s are gaining more sales despite this crisis. Customers are positive about the chickens supplied and don’t mind consuming them. Customer Mr Gu Keda was quoted saying, “I know the chicken supplied to KFC and McDonald's is safe, so it doesn't matter... I'm not afraid to have chicken at all.”

However, it’s not the case for a chicken specialty restaurant, Xiao Shaoxing where sales have been poor since the outbreak of the bird flu. The manager, Chen Wenyao said that people started to panic, worry and they have stopped eating chicken for the moment.

Take 4

If you think it’s Britney saying Oops, you’re wrong.
This time, it’s Wacko’s little sister and Britney’s former sweetheart regretting their over-exposure.

The 2 were performing on CBS Super Bowl half time in front of a nearly 100 million-strong television audience when Janet Jackson’s breast was revealed.

Timberlake claimed that they had practised ‘ripping off’ Jackson’s coat but however was totally stunned when her chest was bared during the broadcast. The artistes, as well as CBS and the show producers have apologised for the surprise, as they did not realise it would go that far.

A recent study had shown that “sex, music and sun” holidays can pose health dangers to many, reported Channelnewsasia.com.

We’re not talking about sunburn or skin cancer either. For young Britons who visit resorts like Ibiza in the Spanish Mediterranean, it’s been said that 1 in 4 men and 1 in 7 women had sex with more than 1 partner. 11% of men and 3% of women had sex with 6 or more partners. About 40% of them admitted that they have unprotected sex with their partners.

This problem can lead to a higher chance of these youngsters getting Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STD), said the British Government who suggested condoms be made available in resorts like Ibiza.

Surely anyone half serious about their own safety won’t pack so light as to leave out the condoms? [top^]

Take 1
Beyonce may have bagged 5 awards at this year’s 46th Grammy Awards, but she wasn’t the only one hogging the spotlight. Though she made a no-show at the awards, Janet Jackson’s absence and ‘just-in-line’ Timberlake’s behaviour had millions of viewers glued to the goggle box, reported The Straits Times.

Both stars were asked to make public apologies for their Super bowl half-time fiasco – Justin ripped off Janet’s top and revealed one of her breasts – in order to attend the awards. This request was obliged by Justin, and rejected by Ms. Jackson.

With Britney, Madonna, Paris Hilton, and now Justin, and Janet on our “Best Scandals” list, we figure Christina Aguilera had better pull up her top, oops, socks and make some splashes of her own.

Recent surveys indicate that local teens are more likely to meet strangers who they have met on the internet, reveal personal information and surf pornographic material than their counterparts from Norway or Ireland.

According to The Straits Times, 3 Nanyang Technological University lecturers surveyed more than 1,100 local children between 12-17 years old and compared them with their Nordic and Irish counterparts to come to this conclusion.

Local teens were 6% more likely to arrange face-to-face meetings with strangers and 16% more likely to meet them frequently.

For clueless parents, the survey also found that 66%, instead of the originally thought 20%, of your children visit pornographic websites.

Either kids are more responsible for Singapore’s reputation of being a leading nation of Internet porn consumers, or they’re just picking up what the adults in their families are doing.

Take 3
X or Y? If doctors were asking you that question in countries like the US, South Korea, Indian, Israel or Italy, you’ll probably be choosing the sex chromosome, and hence determining the gender, of your next baby.

According to a report by The New Paper, Singaporean couples are also playing the XY game, but traveling to hospitals in Malaysia and Thailand, which are seeing more requests for this procedure from couples who only want one child.

If you’re interested, the guarantee will only cost you a maximum of $2,600 or 60,000 baht.

Take 4
Paris, London, China, no, we aren’t talking about the cities but snazzy details from Paris Hilton’s proposal for her upcoming book titled Tongue in Chic: Confessions of An Heiress. if you still don’t know, she plans to name her son London and daughter China, as reported by The Straits Times.

Following in Madonna’s footsteps, Paris’s book however, isn’t for the kids. She has assured her readers pearls of wisdom from her larger, worldly perspective.

Tips include “Never drink Diet Coke. Diet Coke is for fat people.”

How about “Never put a film recorder in the bedroom”, Paris?

Take 5
Trust MTV to pull a bag of surprises. At the 3rd MTV Asia Awards held on Valentine’s Day at the Indoor Stadium, Mariah Carey stunned audiences with her sudden appearance to receive the Lifetime Achievement Award.

However, she only turned up at the photo room backstage and was blocked by her bodyguards from view while she “perked up”, before flashing a big smile to trigger-happy photographers, reported The New Paper.

She also spent a mere few moments on stage, giving only simple thank yous before leaving. For one who’s worked hard for a lifetime, Mariah’s thank you speech sure was short.

Take 1
Teachers from a German school in the northern town of Lueneburg, got high after eating anonymously donated chocolate cake which was doped with hashish, reported Yahoo! News.

About 10 teachers were treated in hospital for nausea and dizziness after eating the cake, which was left at the door to their staff room, a police spokesman said.

"They thought it was food poisoning, but the doctors quickly recognized the problem," the spokesman was quoted saying. "They showed all the classic signs of people under the influence of drugs."

The teachers didn't suspect anything as it was a common practice to buy cakes from students as part a fund-raising project. Blood tests and a sample slice of the dessert showed that it had been tampered with hashish and the culprit is still at large.

Take 2
It was nothing but a string of surprises at the MTV Asia Awards 2004 on Saturday. Local radio personality Suzanne Walker stunned the crowds at the red carpet with her tacky imitation of Janet Jackson's nipplegate act with her flabby tummy hanging over her jeans.

"Look at the number of people who cheered when they saw Justin Timberlake's video, against those who cheered for Gates. Gates got it because he attended the show," said Kenneth Teo, 36, teacher, who attended the MTV Asia Awards with his wife and daughter.
"MTV kept repeating Gareth Gates's music for two weeks non-stop before this show," exclaimed Lily Khoo, 18, a junior college student.

Up against tough competition? No sweat, artistes just have to make sure that their fellow nominees don't grace the event.

Then when it's time for the envelope, make sure yours has a plane ticket with your name on it.

When asked if he had eaten any strange food while abroad, the closest he came to was eating raw horse meat sashimi in Japan. According to him, it tasted like beef.

"I remember being given a strange gift by a horse-meat supplier in Japan. It was horse shampoo and horse shower gel. Don't ask me how they made it. I smelled like a horse after 1 use and never used them again," Douglas was quoted saying.

Stands to reason, if dog shampoo is for dogs, shouldn't horse shampoo and horse shower gel, be for horses?

Take 4
A Valentine's Day text message almost caused a Malaysian newly wedded couple to split up. Apparently, it was sent to the wrong mobile phone number said a report by Yahoo! News.

The couple was driving around a park in Seremban, south off Kuala Lumpur on Valentine's Day when the husband's phone beeped after midnight. With his hands full, he asked his wife to retrieve the message. It read: "Darling, I really miss you, always thinking of you even when you are not here tonight beside me in the bed, I am waiting, lots and kisses and hugs - Jane."

Fuming, the wife demanded her husband bring the car to a stop and accused him of infidelity after being married for only 2 months. She then took a taxi back to her parents' place and refused to take any of his calls and even intended to file for divorce.

It took 12 hours to trace the sender before she called the wife to clear up the misunderstandings. The couple hugged and reconciled.

Looks like the Short Message Service can easily read as Short Marriage Span.

Take 5
In Germany, a truck left a 25-mile trail of raspberry syrup on the highway while on its way to a jam factory reported Yahoo! News.

Police officials said that the cause of the leak was due to improper loading and they sent the driver on his way to Aachen, 280 miles away. The fire department was called up to clean up the slick, which had caused a jam along the highway.

Looks like the poor driver managed to get out of the jam but landed himself in a sticky situation walking the 280 miles.

Take 1
Seems that American Idol is not only a place to groom good singers, but terrible ones as well.

William “She bangs” Hung shot to fame when he appeared in the song contest auditions held in San Francisco, where he did an excellent rendition of his idol Ricky Martin’s “She bangs”, complete with a flora shirt and unorthodox dance moves. And he got banged all right when he got criticised heavily by the judges for not being able to sing or dance.

However, it seems that the infamous American Idol reject is having the last laugh. William has been receiving more exposure than anyone else on the show; and even has more than 1 fan site. The UC Berkeley student who majors in civil engineering have been appearing on talkshows, newspapers and magazines.

In fact, according to ETonline.com he was given a chance to improve his singing when he travelled to the Fantasy Studios in California to get a few singing lessons from Eric Vectro, voice coach to various singers like the Goo Goo Dolls and Shirley Jones.

Moral of the story? Talent is sometimes so overrated in America, then again, you only need to look at president Bush to know that.

It seems that the real Casanova is Ethan Zohn, winner of Survivor: Africa. He dated at least 3 women who were contestants on the mother of all reality TV shows, Survivor, reports Eonline.com

Ethan will probably be in big trouble if he lasts through to the merge with all the 3 in it. They will be bugging him to tell him to pick one out of the 3; wait, maybe not Amber.

Now that’s about as tough a challenge for survival as any the producers can come up with.

Take 3
Barbie is finally ditching Ken after 43 years of dating, says Yahoo.com. An admirable feat even if you don’t stack it next to the quickie union of Britney Spears and Jason Allen Alexander.

Russel Arons, the vice president of marketing at Mattel, was quoted saying that the couple felt that it was probably best they spend some time alone. Or perhaps the truth is, Barbie is getting sick and tired of Ken and she is looking for a new tan as well as a new boyfriend. Maybe that’s when Australian “boogie boarder”, Blaine comes into the picture.

“Like other celebrity couples, their Hollywood romance has come to an end.” But Aron does the cliché and says that Barbie and Ken “will remain (as) friends”.

Take 4
The bilingual method of teaching students Mandarin is being extended to 500 more students in 7 schools.

This is done to allow students to communicate with their Chinese teacher using English, only when they are struggling to find the words in Mandarin.

About 70 percent of those under this scheme want bilingual text as well, but the government says in a Yahoo.com.sg report that the speaking concession is only a “supplementary tool to teach the Chinese language”.

The who are introduced to this scheme are Anglo-Chinese School Junior, Fairfield Methodist Primary School, Henry Park Primary, Marymount Convent School, Methodist Girls' School Primary, Montfort Junior School, St Andrew's Junior School, St. Anthony's Primary School, St. Gabriel's Primary School, St. Michael's School and St. Stephen's School.

Ni zhi dao wo zai jiang shen me mah?

Take 5
Some Singaporeans have been feeling a little shaky either near their work place or their homes recently.

But don’t blame it on your nerves. An earthquake in Indonesia is causing the phenomena; and since that night on 16 of February, there have been 2 tremors to hit Singapore this month. The Meteorological Centre ensured Yahoo.com.sg that experiencing tremors did not necessarily earthquakes are on your doorstep.

Take 1
News reading has taken a whole new perspective. While most people speculate what newscasters wear behind the desk, viewers of Fire/Ice News in Hong Kong need not rack their brains. The newscaster of this adult television channel strips as she reads and is naked by the end of the five-minutes news segment.

Producer of the programme Jesse Au King-Wai said to Taipei Times that he had borrowed the idea from Canadian website nakednews.com. He wants to reinvent how "news and adult content" are presented in Hong Kong and his aim he claims is to "make people think".

However, there aren't many locals (whether girls and boys) who are willing to appear stark naked and read the news reports written by Au and so the show might be axed.

Take 2
While we grapple with what to do to students who struggle with Chinese in Singapore schools, in the United Kingdom the choices get more attractive with time. The Turves Green Boys' Technology College in Birmingham can now sign up to learn the Sindarin, the Elvish language J. R. R Tolkein had made up in his Lord of The Rings books, Yahoo News reported.

Ms Zainab Throp, the school's special needs coordinator said that learning and mastering the ancient language comes in handy for the boys to command their Elvish troops in their "role-playing games" and also "boost their [the boys] self esteem".

So if someone decides to speak Sindarin to you, don't show your ignorance by confusing it with Singapore Mandarin.

Take 3
Old habits die hard, and Governor Schwarzenegger of California is now flexing his muscles in the magazines business after taking on the post of executive editor for 2 fitness magazines, namely Muscle & Fitness and Flex.

Fondly known as Arnie to his fans, the governor who declined a pay for his political post will be receiving an undisclosed amount for this new vocation. Rob Stutzman, the governor's spokesman was cited by Reuters reassuring the public that this stint is part of Schwarzenegger's efforts to "promote healthy lifestyles".

Both magazines have pledged to contribute US$250,000 (S$427,838.26) to the Council on Physical Fitness every year, the wire agency reports.

Let's hope that with this monetary boost, California will recover from its "fiscal crisis" and again be in the pink of health.

Take 4
After the success of Clay Aiken, the next "geek" thing may be John Stevens who garnered 28% of the votes at the semi-finals of American Idol 3.

Voice does matter, but it does help if you look geeky. We bet most of John's votes came from the girls.

Meanwhile, Clay Aiken's popularity continues to soar, evident from the enthusiastic female fans who turned up at American Idol tour st op at the Liacouras Center in Philadelphia. Despite his laid back get up of "blue dress shirt, baggy gray slacks, and running shoes", Clay was clearly favoured over Kelly Clarkson who also performed according to a report in the Philadelphia Inquirer.

Perhaps that's why someone as nerdy and talentless as William Hung could have inspired such adulation.

Take 5
Will Posh and Becks ever be out of the limelight? David Beckham's famous free kick has been made into a logo for Adidas products.

According to Ic Essex, Beckham said, "The image of me taking a free-kick is renowned," as he signed a deal to endorse Adidas till 2008.

While this partnership with Adidas is going smoothly, we can't say ithe same for this ex-Manchester United player relocation to Spain where he plays for Real Madrid. He was reported saying, "I miss Manchester United, I miss the players, my friends there and the fans."

Given the fallout with Man U manager Alex Ferguson, a return to Man U doesn't look to be on the cards.
Instead, Chelsea may be the next club to house this world famous midfielder, their new chief executive Peter Kenyon was reported by Straits Times Interactive saying, "Any club would like see David Beckham wearing their shirt."

The folks at Adidas, of course, are surely hoping a lot more people like wearing a Beckham shirt.

According to E! Online, the case against Kelly for his alleged dalliances in child pornography has been left severely weakened after a ruling by a judge that the photos of Kelly doing the nasty with a young 'un were obtained in an illegal manner by police officers and therefore cannot be presented as evidence for the prosecutor's case.

Jack Whittaker, the lucky guy who laid claim to "the single largest lottery jackpot in U.S history" and US$314.9 million (S$538.9 million) in prize money, according to AP, has been robbed thrice in as many months and is also facing an assault charge brought by a female employee of the Tri-State Racetrack and Gambling Centre, AP reported.

"I'm ready to kill somebody," a pissed-off Whittaker was quoted as saying.

Take 3
With all the talk on how to increase Singapore's rapidly declining birth rate in the recent Budget debates, it's no wonder even our local politicians are getting a little frisky.

In a news story by The Straits Times Interactive, many MPs have spoken up to challenge Singapore's law against oral sex between consenting adults, with lawyer-MP K Shanmugam (Sembawang GRC) saying that "oral sex is common among not an insignificant part of the population … Let us not shrink from confirming that".

Mr Charles Chong (Pasir Ris-Punggol GRC) also raised concerns that the archaic law was not relevant nowadays, but not before qualifying that he's "no cunning linguist".

Take 4
As if being wrongfully convicted for election fraud wasn't bad enough, notorious Aussie ex-politician Pauline Hanson was humiliated this week when she went to the Australian Red Cross Blood Service to donate blood.

According to Yahoo!News, Hanson was rejected because the Blood Service "refuses donations from anyone who has been in jail within the previous 12 months", making Hanson, who was released from an 11-week stint in prison in November after getting her fraud conviction overturned, ineligible.

The founder of the controversial One Nation party, which was famous for its anti-immigrant policy, complained to the Australian Radio Service, saying, "My God, do I feel unclean? Do I feel unsafe? … That's how I feel, that's how I've been made to feel."

Take 5
Not content with making history as China's premiere space traveller, Yang Liwei is now re-writing history.

For the longest time, elementary textbooks in China have perpetuated the belief that the Great Wall of China, one of the 7 ancient wonders of the world, could be seen from outer space in the form of an essay which reads: "A cosmonaut rising radiantly said 'Flying in my spaceship, surveying our Earth from space, I am able to make out two constructions with my bare eyes: One is a Dutch sea embankment, the other is China's Great Wall!'"

But, having been to and back form space, Yang is now saying that is but a myth, according to Yahoo!News. Hence, Chinese government officials are now ordering textbook publishers to change their content to correct this misconception.

One supposes that Chinese pride must have taken one small step forward and one big step backwards.

March 13 to March 19
Persis Yeo’s Take [1] [2] [3] [4] [5]

Take 1
Super sleuth mum Luzaida Cuevas, 31, was reunited with her daughter, Delimar Vera, 6, after more than 6 years of separation.
Back in 1997, then only 10 days old, Delimar was presumed dead after a fire started in her room, reported The Straits Times.

However, Cuevas was adamant that someone had kidnapped her baby and started the fire. Then 6 years after her child vanished, Cuevas was introduced to Aaliyah Hernandez, daughter of Carolyn Correa at a party. Correa is a distant cousin of Pedro Vera, the child’s father and Cuevas’s estranged boyfriend.

Cuevas remembered that Correa had appeared pregnant when she visited her home earlier on the day of the fire. At the party, Correa told relatives that Aaliyah was born 3 days before the date Delimar vanished. Suspicious, the quick-thinking Ms Cuevas, on the pretext of removing chewing gum from Aaliyah’s hair, plucked 5 strands and kept them for DNA testing later.

It turned out that Aaliyah’s DNA matched that of Cuevas and Vera. In fact, mother and daughter had been living just 25km apart. Cuevas credits her resourcefulness to years of watching TV cop shows.

Take 2
The start of 2004 meant an increase of Goods and Services Tax (GST) to 5%. This resulted in falling sales from January.
Pricier items such as home furnishings, timepieces, jewellery and recreational goods fell between 18 and 28%. And according to the latest figures from the Department of Statistics, overall retail sales fell 2.9%to settle on $2.43 billion in January.

However, food and beverages retailers, supermarkets and provision shops presented a stunning sales increase of up to 59%. Sales and profits in the car sales industry were also on the rise, moving up 4.2% over December.

I’ll bet many of the people who are eating out more and upgrading their cars, are the same ones who say they can’t afford to have a baby.

Take 3
Singapore has big plans for a casino on Sentosa and the Southern Islands.

But even if it materialises, this entertainment ‘facility’ will only be available to Singaporeans of a “certain economic class”, Trade and Industry Minister Brigadier-General (NS) George Yeo said. This calculated move is seen as the government again being a watchdog for pockets of Singaporeans who are “unemployed, housewives or retirees”, reported The Straits Times.

A ministry spokesperson said that they “will carefully study the social risks [of building the casino]… safeguards will be put in place [to] deter organised crime and there will be restrictions on access by Singaporeans”.

Offering a 6-year course that leads to a Swiss-based diploma – the International Baccalaureate – it aims to combine regular academic subjects with at least 1 specialisation in an Arts discipline. To be situated in the Waterloo arts district, it will start taking in artistically talented 13-year-olds.

Old kids on the block LASALLE-SIA College of the Arts and Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts, with 20-year and 66-year histories respectively, welcomed the idea of starting them younger . However a cloud of worry looms – will graduates from the Arts School armed with the International Baccalaureate opt for overseas studies rather than enrolling in the 2 respected institutions?

In response, LaSalle and NAFA hope to turn the situation in their favour “by improving the quality of their degree courses and dangling carrots such as the fast-track advancement for Arts School students who take up their programmes”, reported The Straits Times.

Take 5
Armed with a shotgun and 2 pistols, 3 robbers, believed to be Indonesians, fled Pengerang, Malaysia on a motorised sampan [wooden boat] towards Pulau Tekong.

They had robbed a vegetable stall owner of RM$600 (S$270), a tour boat operator of RM$8,000 and made their escape using his sampan, reported The Straits Times.

Pulau Tekong, known for its army barracks and training ground for National Servicemen (NSmen), had all field training in its dense jungles cancelled and all 5,000 or so NSmen were also confined to their barracks for safety.

In a bid to sniff out the trespassers, 700 soldiers and policemen with 12 search dogs combed the island, together with guardsmen, reconnaissance troops, the Special Operations Command and the Gurkhas.

Iraq-born Sam Hashimi was a millionaire, a husband and father of 2 children before he became Samantha Kane, an independent, sexy and successful woman. Now, Samantha is Charles Kane, striving to regain his manhood.

After leading the glamorous and spoilt life of Samantha, Sam realised that his 4 years of sex change surgery to become that perfect woman was a dreadful mistake and “an act against nature”, reported The New Paper.

Being Samantha was tough. He disliked the sex, shopping, gossiping and having to maintain her beauty and body endlessly. “I don't completely regret the past 6 years because it has enabled me to experience the life of both sexes. But I hated being a woman,” said Charles.

Now he's enduring the painful process of reversal surgery to become a man once again, known as Charles Kane. He blames it on his psychiatrist for “recommending him for the gender alignment surgery” when he was undergoing severe depression at that time.

Well he seems to have taken the same advice now that he's depressed again. [^top]

Take 2
In a news story by USATODAY.com, “President Bush's humorous references to the hunt for weapons of mass destruction in Iraq ” at a dinner have been deemed by Democrats as “inappropriate for wartime”. The White House and Republicans argue that it was natural for the president “to poke fun of himself” with political humor at such dinners.

Bush got the crowd roaring with laughter during an annual dinner of the Radio and Television News Correspondents Association as he “provided amusing descriptions of photographs” with awkward poses of himself. For one particular photo, which showed him in an awkward position looking behind the furniture in his office, he remarked "Those weapons of mass destruction have got to be somewhere ... nope, no weapons over there ... maybe under here?”

Referring to the joke as "one of the most despicable acts of a sitting president", Democratic presidential candidate Al Sharpton commented, "Well, that's not a joke to us, Mr. Bush. Five hundred soldiers lost their lives, looking for weapons that weren't there. Billions of taxpayer dollars were spent looking for weapons that weren't there.”

When is the guy going to learn that his stupidity is so blatant that it's no laughing matter? [^top]

The invention of 2 Singaporeans, could be “the first bread-vending machine in world”, reported Streats .

The machine can carry 156 loaves of bread, which will include bagels, buns and French loaves. Besides the usual features of a typical vending machine accepting cash, credit cards and Cashcards, BreadPod even has a special feature that allows one to notify depletion of stocks via SMS.

In 6 months' time, you will see BreadPods at selected MRT stations, office-buildings and factories.

The bread machine has also attracted parties from overseas as well as a budget airline for $14,000 each.

Take 4
Saddam Hussein's formerly owned palaces in Iraq will now be transformed into tourist attractions, claimed Bayan Bakir Solagh, acting construction and housing minister.

After much study, he added that it would be best to convert these 70 palaces “into guest palaces for visiting officials and some for tourist purposes”, reported The Straits Times. Visitors can now witness how money was wasted to construct these palaces when they could have been replaced with “50,000 housing units to accommodate 50,000 homeless Iraqi families” says Mr Solagh.

While these empty palaces, now under control of the US-led coalition, are turned into attractions for tourists, the United Nations require US$369 million [S$623,096,884.89] to fund a housing rehabilitation programme in Iraq over the next 4 years. How ironic! [^top]

Take 5
The movie, Passion of the Christ ranks third on Cathay's block-bookings list. According to a report by Channel NewsAsia, “more than 30 churches [in Singapore ] have block-booked tickets” for the Passion of the Christ which releases next Thursday under the category, Mature 18 (M18).

With the objective of raising funds for a charity event, City Harvest Church has placed a booking of 26,000 tickets, while the Catholic Church has booked 1,800.

Looks like Mel Gibson's controversial movie, which has survived the local censors uncut, might create ticketing riots more than religious ones. [^top]

“Get healthy or Get out” – that’s the latest message sent to snack suppliers in Australia.

According to Channelnewsasia.com, research has shown that 1 in every 3 children is overweight. And it has been anticipated that approximately half of the nation will be experiencing some weighty issues by 2020.

Dubbed the “fattest nation on Earth”, Australia is now taking measures to curb the escalating number of obese people. School canteens in Australia are to serve more fruits and vegetables and to cut back on snacks, pizzas and pasta. And, probably the worst nightmare for the younger generation, soft drinks, chips and other unhealthy food choices, will be permitted only twice every school term.

Our friends Down Under won’t stop at anything to keep their weight Down and Under control. [^top]

AFP reports that the three-year long romance between Tom Cruise, and Penelope Cruz has finally ground to a halt.
Cruise 41, and the spicy 29-year-old have gone their separate ways but, as his sister and publicist Lee Anne De Vette was quoted saying, “it was an amicable [one]”. Apparently, they are still on very good terms, according Cruz’s spokesman.

Married to Nicole Kidman for 10 years before splitting up, Cruise hooked up with Cruz merely a week after that shocking piece of news. Kidman, who won the Oscar for Best Actress in 2003 for the film, The Hours, is doing great by herself. She has been romantically involved with celebrities such as Jude Law and Lenny Kravitz.

Japan beat Singapore 2-1 in the 2006 World Cup Asian group qualifier, but Singaporeans shouldn’t hang their heads in shame because, as reported by Channelnewsasia.com, the Singapore Pools speculated that Singapore would be defeated by a margin of at least 4 goals.

Of course we don’t have a very strong team to begin with, but humiliating odds like this will do nothing to help the morale of our boys either. I suppose they never expected Singapore Pools to be such a wet blanket. [^top]

In Karachi, Pakistan, 2 lovers had once been separated as they were from opposing tribes. Now, they are together at last by the order of the Sindh High Court, says the BBC News.

Shaista Almani and Balakh Sher Mehar, married 9 months ago under the strict scrutiny of their respective tribes. They later fled but were captured and returned to their tribes’ elders. Even Pakistani President, Pervez Musharraf, was involved. He made sure that Almani would be well-protected.

The police brought the couple to court and finally, the verdict was to free them as this was of personal matters. Both Almani and Mehar are said to be happily settled down. [^top]

According to reporter Steve Jones from BBC News, “Men are biologically hard to get rid of.”

He says that male genes will be more common among the next generation and there may even be a surplus of men over women. In countries such as India and China, female babies, who are deemed worthless, are often killed upon birth.

But if Jones’s theory is correct, after thousands of years, surely there would be more men than there are now, no? [^top]

Queer Eye for the Straight Girl, a spin-off of the highly popular Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, is set to make its debut in 2005, reports http://www.msnbc.com/.

Where the original series had 5 gay men giving fashion and etiquette advice to heterosexual men, Queer Eye for the Straight Girl will have ‘the fab five’ dishing out the same advice to women.

The smart move by cable television network Bravo will surely secure high ratings, with audiences around

America

wondering how long the ladies will be able to tolerate men telling them how to dress. This reporter would start placing bets on number of cat-fights per episode.

According to http://www.cnn.com/, Briton Ashley Revell, 32, has sold every one of his possessions, clothes and all, and will bet the entire 75,000 pounds he is worth on a single spin of a roulette wheel on Easter Sunday; all this in a tuxedo – rented, of course.

A win will double Revell’s wealth, while a loss will leave him with, well, even the rented tux off his back.

Britain

’s Sky One television has decided that someone should cash in on Revell’s potential loss, and is making the gamble a reality television show, though they are not paying Revell anything, whether he wins or loses. Easter Sunday will see if Revell’s small fortune is resurrected, or not.

Scotland

’s got a killer on the loose. In a report on http://www.ananova.com/, James McCormick, 17, of Glasgow, was released, “by mistake”, at Lanarkshire’s Hamilton Sheriff Court. Reliance Custodial Services hold the responsibility for the heinous mistake.

Having once won a “multi-million-pound contract to escort prisoners to and from Scottish courts”, Reliance isn’t look too reliable after this screw up. McCormick was sentenced to life imprisonment last year after a guilty verdict for stabbing 17-year-old Thomas Loughrey. The police have been notified of the slip-up, and the public has been warned that McCormick could be dangerous.

Canada

has decided it’s better for infants to sit still than learn to walk and risk falling. According to news.bbc.co.uk, they recently banned the sale, import and advertising of baby walkers, making it the first country to take this step, or rather, not take a step.

Health Minister Pierre Pettigrew feels that these baby chairs with wheels pose a hazard to infants, basing his decision on the continued injuries of infants in walkers.

There have been 1,935 reports of the walkers causing injury to infants from 1990 to 2002.

Doctors may not be necessary in delivering newborns, even when there are complications.

According to an article on news.bbc.co.uk, a 40-year-old woman in an outlying part of

Mexico

performed a Caesarean operation on herself with a kitchen knife, and delivered her baby boy after slashing her abdomen in 3 different places. This is the first reported case where a self-operated Caesarean section has left both mother and child survivors.

The unidentified woman was able to give one of her children instructions to call a local nurse before passing out. The woman and baby were sent to the nearest hospital – 8 hours away – and were treated.

One thing we know is that the new mother will have a colourful story to tell when her miracle son asks her where he came from.

Take 1
In a bid to garner public support and raise enlistment numbers, the Japanese navy commissioned a television commercial broadcasting its mission to send security troops to Iraq. In the commercial, 7 actors similarly dressed to popular 70s disco band The Village People were dancing atop the ship deck presumably as sailors and singing (roughly translated):

"Nippon Seaman Ship, Seaman Ship-o, For Love ... For Peace"
"I Love Japan, I Love Peace, The Maritime Self-Defense Force."

Reuters reported that according to a senior officer at the navy, the ad was required because, "There are a lot of young people and women who don't seem interested (in the navy)."

Take 2
The Associated Press reported that an increasing number of third-world passengers are smuggling local meats for family festivals into Western airports. Airport officials at Gatwick airport in England arrested a 48-year-old woman from Gambia for trying to bring in a total of 13 pounds of goat and snail meat and 172 pounds of catfish. While a woman from Cameroon arriving at Hartsfield-Jackson airport in Atlanta for a wedding had a whole smoked monkey confiscated.

An official from the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service said these airport apprehensions are "only the tip of the iceberg" when it comes to the business of illegally importing traditional meats.

Now, the sight of a bride decked in Vera Wang digging into a braised leg of zebra is not very pretty.

Take 3
In a New York Daily News report, freelance photographer Robert Levin sued the Waste Management company for approximately S$84 million to cover the injuries which included brain damage he sustained while he as at New York City's Ground Zero trying to capture some shots.

To get a better view, Levin had sneaked on top of one of the company's garbage trucks when the driver unexpectedly drove away, causing Levin to fall. Levin accused Waste Management of negligence and "failure to respect (my) rights as a pedestrian".

How someone sneaking around and trespassing atop a vehicle can be considered a pedestrian is mind-boggling, but we've seen stranger lawsuits on Ally McBeal.

Take 4
A man was arrested in the St. Louis County Courthouse for allegedly removing his pants and making photocopies of his buttocks in the crowded reception area. When Daniel Everett was found by the police, he was just about to make his third copy.
Witnesses at the scene were reported by The USA Today that Everett asked the police, ''What did I do? What did I do?'' The immature 38-year-old told police that he made the copies for his girlfriend as a prank.
Word of Advice: Take this from a girl. Stupidity in a boyfriend is never funny.

Take 5
The USA Today reported that Percy, a 3-legged mongrel with no tail, deserves full credit for saving the life of her owner. Christina Lowman, 47, was knocked unconscious when she slipped on an icy ramp just outside her home on Christmas morning. Not being able to tell for certain how long she was lying in the 11-degree Fahrenheit cold, Lowman said that she could have died if Percy did not help her.
''When I woke up, the dog was licking my face,'' She said. ''He brought me to life by licking my face and barking.''
Man's best friend just couldn't get any better.

Take 1
A café has opened in Nanjing, eastern China specifically for patrons to bawl their eyes out according to The Straits Times. The owner of Good Mood Cry Café Mr Luo Jun hatched his idea when he noticed a woman on the verge of crying at a teahouse. As he went up to comfort the lady, she turned away and left.

Other than playing sad songs in the background and providing chilli and onions to induce crying, the café also has unbreakable toys for their clients to vent their frustrations.

After the crying session, patrons are offered lozenges and paper napkins. The charge for these services is 50 yuan (S$10) per hour.

$10 an hour for lozenges, paper napkins and to throw toys about? Mr Luo must be laughing all the way to the bank. [^top]

A schoolteacher in Zimbabwe has been accused of imposing punishments on students by giving them a choice of either receiving strokes of the cane or suckling her breasts.

A boy reported the incident to his parents after he was punished for being noisy. Having to choose between 100 strokes of the cane and suckling of the teacher’s breasts, the boy chose the latter, as did 14 other students reported The Herald.

The teacher has since been suspended. She allegedly admitted to the accusations but no reasons were given.

Take 3
Macy Gray went stark naked during her performance at the Coronet in Elephant and Castle for a good cause reported Ananova.

Her 2-hour gig was to raise money for a charity started by Sir Elton John to combat AIDS in Africa.

She was fully clothed till prior to the end of the performance where she exited the stage, only to return wearing nothing but a pair of designer shoes by Jimmy Choo.

Macy shielded her naked body from the crowd by resting on a chair a la well renowned call-girl Christine Keeler while delivering her hit, ‘I Try’.

Maybe she should take a leaf from Star Wars’ Yoda: ‘‘Do, or do not [perform truly nude]. There is no try.’’ [^top]

Take 4
36 participants are competing in the Fujitsu Cold Room Challenge for a chance to win the grand prize - $20,000 worth of Fujitsu products, including a 50-inch plasma screen.

The participants have to stand in a cold room of 16 degrees Celsius for 72 hours. They are allowed 15 minutes rest every 6 hours to eat and use the loo, said Channel News Asia.

Take 5
4-year-old Matthew Harrison is the youngest member of Mensa, an elite organisation for geniuses according to Mirror.co.uk. He is among 30 whizzes in the country who are younger than 10 in Mensa.

He was already learning Spanish from TV and had 70 words in his vocabulary when he was just 1 year old. Matthew’s IQ is 130 for his age, which is equivalent to 148 of an adult’s.

Both his parents, who never went to college, aren’t exceptionally smart. Chris, his father mentions that Matthew was always asking tough questions and had a good language sense.

Chris continues to say that Matthew, although showing extraordinary capabilities by speaking very early, is still a normal kid; liking “comics and stuff other kids like”.

Maybe so, but even if you cut Matthew’s IQ by half, he'll still be smarter than Newlyweds star Jessica Simpson. [^top]

Take 1
A massive blackout hit the Greece capital of Athens, triggering concerns about the possibility of a repeat at next month’s Olympic games, reported the Associated Press.

As temperatures soared to a high of 40 degrees Celsius, the worst power failure in more than a decade affected homes, traffic signals and electric trolleys all over the capital, and areas as far as islands located in the Aegean and Ionian seas. According to an anonymous government official, the “domino-effect” power failure was traced to “an imbalanced flow of electricity that shut down 4 power-generating stations”.

Take 2
While on holiday in Melbourne, Australia, British tourist Fraser Claughton purchased a beat-up suitcase from a local flea market, not realising that it was full of rare Beatles memorabilia.

Yahoo! News reported that the collection, which contained items like photos, concert programmes and unreleased recordings, was believed to be the long lost ‘Mal Evans archive’. Mal Evans, formerly the band’s sound recordist and groupie, was killed by Los Angeles police in 1976 for wielding a fake gun.

This precious find certainly has gone on ‘The Long and Winding Road’ to get to the other end of the world. [^top]

Take 3
The Singapore Armed Forces detonated a Japanese aerial bomb that was found at a construction site, according to a report from Reuters.

A construction worker at a site near the Central Business District (CBD) area found the bomb that dates back to World War II. The bomb was subsequently set off by SAF personnel.

The report also stated that intact WWII bombs and artillery rounds would “occasionally turn up at construction sites and beaches”.

In the wake of the Nicoll Highway tragedy, and this revelation, the worker’s hardhat suddenly seems woefully inadequate. [^top]

Take 4
According to the Associated Press, US President George W. Bush has defended his decision to invade Iraq, saying that invading Iraq has “made America safer”.

In his speech at Oak Ridge National Laboratory in Tennessee, President Bush said that though the US did not uncover “stockpiles of weapons of mass destruction”, he insisted that America was right to go into Iraq as they had stopped a “declared enemy of America who had the capability of producing weapons of mass murder and could have passed that capability to terrorists bent on acquiring them”.

Coulda, woulda… maybe he shoulda relied on something less flimsy than his own thought processes. [^top]

According to The Straits Times, 1,800 of the coveted National Day Parade (NDP) tickets have gone uncollected after the July 11 deadline. The apparent reason for this rare phenomenon is that applicants gave the organisers an invalid phone number, resulting in them being uncontactable about their successful ballot.

There are at least a few possible explanations for this:
1. There are 1,800 dyslexic Singaporeans who were successful at the ballot.
2. 1,800 of them took AirAsia/Valuair trips out of the country at the time of the call because it was off-peak season.
3. 1,800 of them changed their handphones and numbers from the time they first registered for the ballot.
4. 1,800 of them were kiasu (afraid to lose out) and tried to secure multiple chances by registering with as many numbers as they could and got some of them wrong. [^top]

March 13 to March 19 Persis Yeo’s Take [1] [2] [3] [4] [5]

March 13 to March 19
Persis Yeo’s Take [1] [2] [3] [4] [5]